Working in Montréal today --Line Girl and Staci

Good morning folks,

I will be working in Montréal today,

"Me and Staci have a special friendship, it's an ionic bond."  'scuse me?  The girl in the security line seemed to be speaking to me but I had no idea who Staci was nor why they had an 'ionic' bond.

I also don't know if Staci spells her name that way, but I figured the ending with the 'i' was fitting for the odd conversation.  Line Girl ignored my query and carried on blindly speaking with someone behind her.  That or she was speaking to me and she simply ignored my question.

Yes, I also was irked by the poor grammar.   Staci and I have a special friendship.  You can quickly determine when to use I and when to use me, by removing the second party.  I have a special.. Me have a special... See, it's easy.

She continued, "We've been friends forever, there's not nothing we wouldn't do for each other."  I thought, perhaps she meant they share a covalent bond?  This friendship of double negatives that she has had since the earth cooled.

I mean, why would she choose the weakest of the atomic bondings to characterize her friendship?

Okay quick break, there are three types of bonding, covalent, ionic and metallic.   Covalent is the bonding of two non metals where the atoms bond by sharing at least one electron.  Is a strong bond and has a high boiling point.  Ionic bonds are between one metal and a non metal and as the non metal is generally stronger it robs an electron from the metal and the two maintain a bonding that is the result of electrostatic attraction, a +/- thing.  It is a weaker bond than covalent and has a low boiling point.  Metallic bonding occurs between two metals and is the electrostatic attraction between positively charged ions and the valence electrons which are delocalized -not associated with any particular atom.  The greater the sea of delocalized electrons and cation ions (more protons than electrons) the higher the bond, the higher the melting point.

Sodium Chloride (metal - non metal; is ionic and easily broken)
Carbon dioxide (non metal - non metal; is covalent and hard to break)
Brass (metallic; alloy -the bonding of metals zinc and copper)
Staci and Line Girl (ionic -low boiling point)

And we're back.  

This may trouble me the rest of the day.  Maybe she meant Ironic or Iconic.  I wear a Rob Ford for PM Tshirt, but I only wear it ironically. I am not sure what an Ironic friendship would be, Staci thinks they are BFFs but Line Girl is plotting Staci's demise?  Iconically like Ren & Stimpy?  Line Girl is now as famous as anyone else ever mentioned in a Pulp, so maybe this will be the start of their icon status.

Line Girl and Staci!  Has a catchy feel, no?

Maybe it was Isometrical -their friendship for each other exerting and having an equal quality of measure?  Or Insular -they both share a disinterest in expanding their understanding of cultures, ideas, philosophy or vocabulary?

Bah, nowhere else to go with this.  But I may resurrect Line Girl and Staci in some future Pulp.

Right about now Brent from Racquetball is fuming, he has read through this Pulp wondering where the Hell his shout-out is.  It was somewhat promised.  Not by me, but by Brian.  Yes the same Brian from the Pulp -I was wrong, Brian was right -from a few years back.

Brent is a man with a few extremely specific skills.  He has a good serve in the court and he knows the population of Switzerland.  It is an odd specific set, Oh! and he knows coffee.  I must warn you though, given the opportunity he will swing the conversation, or will enlist a shill to swing the conversation, to Switzerland, when he will triumphantly explain that the population of Switzerland is 8.081 million.

Watching a Blue Jays' game a few Sundays ago at the pub.

Brent: "So Jose Bautista is from Dominican Republic right?"

Me: "Why, yes Brent he is."

Brent: "A lot of players come from the DM don't they, what do you suppose the population is of the DM?"

Me: "Oh, about 10 million, why do you ask?"

Brent: "Well, I am just wondering with Switzerland having 8.081 million people, why isn't there at least 80% as many players coming from Switzerland?"

Me: "That's a good question Brent, you're a worldly knowledgable guy."

John U sitting at the same bar table: "What the F*** are you guys talking about?!"

Heather our favorite bartender: "You guys are weird."

Have a great day and choose your words carefully.