Thursday, 27 August 2015

Working in Ottawa today --Local and Global Convergence

Good morning folks,

I will be working in Ottawa today.

In life and everything (yes, it is not too early in the AM for sweeping generalizations!) a convergence of balance and harmony is required.

Is this a planetary thing Uncle Daniel?  

No.  But yes.  but no.  That which you are referring to is no doubt the Harmonic Convergence which occurred on August 16 1987 when there was the world's first synchronized meditation event that coincided with a grand trine of alignment of the Sun, Moon and six of the eight planets.  Or is that nine?  Is Pluto back in good graces?

No.

Is it an economic thing?

Sure, but no.

That would be the economic theory of global convergence which theorizes that poorer economies will grow at a faster rate than wealthier economies and after sufficient time all economies should converge to a common level of per capita income.  I think that was from the only class I attended in Macro Economics.  That or from The Wealth of Nations -Adam Smith.

A math thing?

Ah.. Closer.  There is that Local Convergent thing in numerical analysis where by an iterative method successive approximations result in a convergence on the solution.  Like yesterday when I was asked to make a donation to a charity for the social committee with cash they raised.  I figured sure, but it would be unfair for me to benefit from the tax credit.  So I should donate a grossed up amount to shed the tax credit back to the charity,  Doh!  That creates another tax credit.  So it too would need to be donated.. Repeat ad nauseam.. the answer is .. assuming a .46 nominal tax rate and assuming that you already have at least $200 in charitable contributions so that you qualify for the best tax credit.  For each $100 raised and handed to me, I need to contribute $185. So that only the charity benefits from the fund raiser.

But still no.

Well.. You are flying today (right now actually), is it a plane thing?

Yes and no.

It is not a plane centre of gravity thing.  A quick note on that.  A plane has three axis.  The normal axis, running through the fuselage from tail to nose; the vertical axis running exactly that, vertical through the fuselage right at the centre of gravity from to back and side to side; and lastly , the horizontal axis running approximately wing tip to wing tip also through the fuselage.  That sweet spot is certainly the convergence of balance of these three axis on the plane, but not quite the subject of today's Pulp.

No.

When I boarded the aircraft, my colleague Mark was already sitting in his seat, 2C and on seeing me he stated that he was not sure what it meant when he arrived and saw some other traveller sitting in seat 1D.

Huh?

Folks.. seat 1D is my favorite seat on the short haul flight from Toronto to Ottawa or Toronto to Montréal and the return flights.  Most people don't like it as sure, it's in biz class, but it is right behind the galley bulkhead so it's just a little inconvenient for traveling with a bag (which I rarely do) and a little hard to reach the TV screen, but it has one distinct benefit.  You get served first.  On a short flight a few minutes is the difference between eating quickly and not getting a chance to enjoy your coffee and having time to languish in opulence and an enjoyable cup of coffee.

So others that I travel with regularly know, Daniel is in seat 1D. It's his signature move.

But not today.  When I booked, someone else already had my spot!

Marked expressed concern.. "This will set the whole day off wrong.. Is the plane safe?"  Ha, just a mocking question in jest, sure, I laughed it off, but secretly the anxiety level was already raised. The perspiration already running down my brow, the tingling spidey sensation on the back of my neck.  I needed to be prepared for the worst.

What might happen, everything will be wrong by an offset of 4 seats!   And then it happened.

I received my tray.  Fruit plate, yogurt, a slice of a sweet loaf and my coffee.  And...

My fruit had a bug!    

Someone clearly had a special order breakfast and I got theirs!  Guy in 1D was enjoying my bug free plate, my cup of coffee, folks.. he was using my linen napkin!!

Oh wait..

It's a seed.  It just looked like a bug.

Alright, disaster averted, and.. I still do have time to drink my coffee, albeit a bit rushed.

So Uncle Daniel do we understand this correctly, you just wrote a Pulp on the calamity of you not getting your favorite seat in business class of a flight today and a bug that wasn't even a bug but a seed?  Such a first world problem.

Well..  Sure.. when you put it like that.. Yes I did. But there is no time to write a new one.  The Pulp must be published, Our wheels are only 50 feet from the runway. No time! 

Have a great day, I hope that your problems today are all minor as well.

4 comments:

  1. An embarrassment to all of your readers! Keep up the good work :)

    ReplyDelete