Thursday, 10 September 2015
Working in Ottawa today --The gods hate trailer parks
Good morning folks,
I will be working in Ottawa today.
Do the gods hate trailer parks? Last night after racquetball at the pub the conversation turned to weather anomalies. It was right about then that I remembered where I was in the afternoon of July 31 1987.
Damn. Okay, gotta change topics for a second. Why are all of these parents protesting the new Ontario sex Ed curriculum without having read it? I read it over briefly and it doesn't have all of the evils that the protesters say it does. There is no teaching of oral sex to kids in grade 3. In grade 1 yes there is a 'name that genitalia' lesson, but shouldn't little Billy know that his appendage is called a penis? He knows what his foot is called, why not his John Thomas? This knowledge will not curve his spine nor cause hair growth on the back of his hands. Even the kindergarten kids in Kindergarden Cop knew what penises and vaginas are.
In grade 3 they should know about same sex marriages, and that's why Mary has two moms and it's perfectly normal. Give me a reason that they shouldn't know this. In grade 7 the curriculum calls for education in understanding sexual relationships and that maybe they should wait until they are older be it digital, oral, genital, anal contact. Seems reasonable to me, and the talk that parents should have with children, but a huge number do not. Interesting, I bet it is the same parents keeping their children out of the school that fail to have those chats with their children.
Reporter, "have you read the curriculum?" Woman, "why would I read that filth?" Ignorance, the root and stem of every evil. -Plato, hanging out in Greece around 370 BCE (yes, well before the debt crisis).
Okay, back to weather anomalies. The afternoon of July 31 1987 found both myself and my friend Andy K. both of us up at U of A in Edmonton for some courses on labour relations and that fine Friday afternoon heading back to Lethbridge in my green pickup. Yes, a fine Alberta lad.
As we made our way to highway 2 south, I believe when we were on 51 ave nw, the sky became extremely upset with all those mortals on the ground. The sky's turned not black but a strange dark grey with blue and purplish hues and then it unleashed a torrent of hail upon our persons and vehicles. The noise of the hail on my truck's roof and hood was absolutely defeating. I decided, that then was a great time to pull off the road under a gas station canopy and fill my tank.
While standing there filling my truck with very combustible liquid a bolt of lightening damn near blinded me when it struct a tall metal pole on the side of the gas station lot and eradicated what looked like a perfectly good air-raid siren. The horn crashed to the ground with a trail of sparks and debris.
Air-raid siren? Yeah, they used to be scattered all over left over from the the nuke scares of the 50s and 60s. I don't spot them around much, but there are still some.
So as my vision restored from tunnel panic, I noticed that the fuel pump had shut down. And then restarted. At Zero! Whoohoo, free fuel! The celebration short lived though, when I went in to pay the attendant, he had both receipts waiting. Oh well.
And off Andy and I went. Now as we made our way the several more blocks to highway 2 the man on the radio was explaining that Edmonton was being struck by tornados and you would think that would stop a few Alberta boys from heading to the highway. Nope.
The wind was buffeting us around quite a bit, several unexpected lane changes, but continue we did. Now I was relying on Andy to navigate, but what And was speaking was not directions. Oh no.
No, instead Andy was rattling on about the path of righteousness is beset by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men, and blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children!
Um.. Andy, Am I that shepherd? I am doing the driving, or are we the weak? Then Andy headed off into the Lord testing the righteous and raining snares, fire and brimstone upon them. I think Andy finished up with the four horsemen of the apocalypse and the earth being cast into a lake of fire.
(Yes I know that I didn't quote Ezekiel, Psalms and Revelations correctly, but cut me some slack, I'm at 27,000 feet and don't have King James with me)
It was a surreal experience driving through what really looked like the end of days to the voice over of Andy giving a great sermon. Yes, Andy knows his bible and exactly when to liven up a conversation!
That tornado attack on Edmonton took 28 lives, and ended its one hour rip through the city shortly after it demolished the Evergreen Mobile Home park.
I saw Andy a year or so ago, had dropped in to Lethbridge and had dinner with him and another friend from there. We recounted the drive but I don't think I remembered to ask him, but I figured the gods don't like trailer parks.
Have a great day. Watch out for the weather.